too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
