they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
