that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
