My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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