His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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