batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
3pm strippers are depressing
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Randomize
