Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
