im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
