Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
