I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
