I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
