as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
