you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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