I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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