check it out our google latitudes are spooning
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
