Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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