How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
So much rum. So many feels.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
