She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
