Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
