I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize