yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
