Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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