You can't special order awesome
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
