mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
