were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
My vagina just recognized that song.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
