I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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