Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
