..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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