She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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