I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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