And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
