It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
