ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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