you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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