and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
