Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Randomize
