i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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