new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
