i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
