you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
