Welp...herpes.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I still have a little drunk in my system
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
i out mim tonsoeep
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