How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
