We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
