I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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