So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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