I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
