so that wasnt chicken after all
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
