Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
