You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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