the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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