i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
